Girls marry their fathers... eventually

Not earthshattering, I know....but I was just thinking about how this has played out in my life. Anybody who reads this probably knows I have been married three times.

1) Mr. Ick (not his real name) - started dating when I was 16, he was 20. Relationship created out of my need for "normalcy" after my 18 year old brother took his own life. Married at 18, divorced 3 years later. Evidently, Normalcy is really not for me.

2) Paul (his real name) - Father of my children, artist, now a plumber. Met in college, beginning of relationship overlapped with end of marriage. Smart Guy, nice guy, but since this is a public blog, I'm not going to go into any detail about how it ended or why. The great news is that we have kept our relationship very functional since we divorced after 5 years of marriage, when our children were not quite 3 years old. 12 years later, we are both happy being married to someone else!

3) Scott (his real name) - Third time is the charm... Scott is 10 years my senior - very smart guy, a very loving man. Talented in many ways - none of them have anything to do with his profession! He's brilliant, a musician, a gastronome, and a big fan of martini's (Shaken, not stirred of course). He has plenty of demons in his past - sometimes they surface. He claims I fall for "tragic" guys. I think he's right. I also fall for guys who can have a real conversation, a conversation that stretches me intellectually.

And that's where marrying my father comes in. While my dad has been dead for 18 years, I can honestly say my fondest memories of him were at the dinner table, arguing about something, or learning from him. Or watching the news and hearing his point of view, and voicing my own. He taught me how to have a respectful, balanced debate. He also taught me to question everything. These are all qualities that attract me to others. It's too bad that Scott and I didn't meet at a point where having children together was feasible (we both have enough apart, thank you very much).. we would have produced some interesting kids.

But that's the point - girls end up marrying their fathers, and boys end up marrying their mothers, because they want to continue those traits which they find most attractive.

Think back to your won relationships... did you (will you) end up being married to your mom or dad? I did, and I'm proud to say it!