Life after Nano

One last post on my Nano experience - I promise, I'll be done obsessing about this after this post... for the last two days I have been experiencing withdrawal like symptoms, a mild depression, if you will. I guess it's a pretty common phenomenon amongst nano-er's marathon runners and the like (I didn't really just put myself in the same company as marathon runners did I? I didn't mean to!) .

As posted previously, I crossed the 50K line at about 10:45 PM, all alone, the house was full of sleeping children, dogs and husband. And although I really did want to do a loud victory lap, I instead just emailed my document to myself, validated my word count, shut down my computer and turned on Criminal Minds. No Champagne toast, no pats on the back, no post implementation happy hour.... Nope, I guess that is the life of someone who pukes out words on a piece of paper or a screen. Solitary. Alone with your own crappiness or awesomeness, take your pick. I told my kids the next morning, they were happy for me...my husband took me out for a celebratory cocktail the next night, and so it feels a little more like a win. But it won't be a good win until I finish. On Vacation, in December.

I did learn some things about myself in the process, though:

1) Quantity was not a problem for me. I hit the 50K with only a few days where I had to put myself in solitary. I suspect that the quality of my writing is at a C+... I'll let you know. Otherwise, I proved that given enough dedication, I could write a complete 162 pages without issue. I'm kind of proud of that fact!

2) The creative lion (what some people call their muse) I used to have inside of me (Whom I loved to tame on a regular basis) was just in a self induced Coma. She woke up when I started the project, and I hope that she won't go back into the coma now that I know she's still there. I surprised myself at how far out ideas just came up. I do still have the ability I thought I lost.

3) I have many pet phrases that I use when I write, and they are wrong! For example: "Oh, she's an idiot" Gene thought to herself. Since when do people think to someone other than themselves/ IS think even a transitive verb. Ack!

4) I like writing about food. How it looks, tastes, smells, all of it. I may explore this avenue further in next year's project.

5) it didn't matter that I dropped my typing class in high school in exchange for a more useful elective (Advanced Humanities)... I type mighty fine, thank you Mrs. Anderson (My teacher).

6) I really can't have any noise in the background to write. It must be utter silence, or just white noise. No TV, Music, conversations. I'm a real loner. That's my Myers Briggs "I" coming out.

7) A blank page really doesn't scare me. Just start, and it comes.

8) I am very motivated by progress against a goal. I've said for years that I'm not, but I was wrong. If you can graph it on a bar chart it makes me move. I need to remember that.

9) I really do enjoy creative writing. I'm a business writer most of my days, but I do like the idea of fabricating a reality and putting it on a piece of paper.... wait a minute, maybe those are the same things!

10) No one was surprised that I finished. Not my children, my husband or my friends. When I've told them I've finished the challenge, they've all said. "Of course you did." I guess it's been a long time since I've seen myself as finishing something that I'm proud of....

That last one, by the way, is the reason I started the project. I needed to know if I still had it in me to succeed, with no one but myself to blame. As many obstacles as we face in the day to day reality of the job, or family pressures, it doesn't mean they completely block your success. Take a lesson from a river - if you find your way is blocked, create a new way to get through.